Why do we fill our shelves with knick knacks? Is it to simply fill empty surfaces? Why must they be filled? Are we afraid of hurting someone's feelings (by not displaying a gift)? Is it to show off our wealth? Is it to remember someone? Is it to prove that we are educated and cultivated (shelves of books)? Is it to escape our own reality ("this shell reminds me of happy vacation times")? Is it to prove that we have been places and are wordly (tiki statuette)? The last three especially ring true to me.
In my previous, bedroom community life, I had unconsciously filled my home with travel books and artifacts collected all over the world: A way for me to impress friends and separate myself from a settled community that I longed to escape. But I have since come to realize that the pictures in my head, the experiences lived and the memories shared with my husband of that world trip are more important. They live forever and can never be taken away, stolen, damaged or burnt. On the other hand, artifacts can. The library now stores our books. I am free of the responsibilities related to possessing such objects.
My story might not ring true to everyone but what I know for sure, is that the pretexts that I hear from my clients point to the reasons given above. "Oh I can't let that go, I bought it in Thailand!", or "I paid X amount for it!," or "My mother made it!," or "My friend gave it to me," or "It reminds me of happy vacation times." Are those reasons good enough to clutter your walls, shelves and overall life? They do not seem valid enough to me anymore. People do not give us things/presents to burden us, they give them to us as a simple, sometimes cultural gesture, not to clutter our space.
Putting much value on such items teaches our kids to do the same. With parenting comes the question: What important life lessons do we want to teach our kids? We choose to teach ours that there is more to life than stuff. It is experiences and people that make life rich, and it starts with parents living with less.
"The stuff that I cherish is mine to cherish - I don't expect my children to keep it and I have told them as much" Anonymous... Valid outlook on heirloom guilt, but, to the question: "What does your mom love?" I would not want my kids to answer "her porcelain dolls."
"Telling our kids" is one thing, but "living by example" is another, and in my mind, a more powerful way of getting an important message through to them.
I have questioned my past pretexts and feel liberated from the false reasons that had me display non-functional things. Today, I only display a handful of very select ones.
Again, I do not write this blog to dictate, but rather to share my experiences, and hear yours.
What keeps you from emptying your curio shelves?
I empty my shelves and clear out the clutter because it makes me feel free. Everytime a bag of "stuff" goes to Goodwill I can literally feel a weight being lifted from my shoulders!
ReplyDeleteChristine
i would love to get rid of more things, but my husband likes to keep things more than i do. not to say that i am perfect! but, before we were married... i didn't have a lot of things. now i feel like i have way too much stuff!!! we are working on it, one baby step at a time!
ReplyDeleteDear Bea,
ReplyDeleteYour blog carries a beautiful message. As you know, it imparts many Buddhist philosophies about how liberating it can be to free yourself from "stuff" and other attachments. It's nice to see someone living the dream:)
However, I'd beg to differ with you on the emptying of treasures that remind of us of special times and places. For people I know who have been stricken with mind-altering diseases, especially the insidious kind that make those wonderful memories hazy and sometimes barely recognizable, such items can help bring those times back for a person and loved ones too.
I'm not saying we should hold all our junk until everyone develops Alzheimer's or dementia, but I don't see a problem with keeping a few treasures around, especially those treasures we shared with our parents and other loved ones who may no longer be with us.
If you've found a way to deal with this, I'm all ears...In the meantime, keep up the great work.
For those attached to knick-knacks, consider photographing them, and then passing them on. Save the photos to your computer or flash drive. It's obviously not the same as possessing them, but you'll still be able to look at them and remember the sentiments/memories behind them.
ReplyDeleteThis makes so much sense! We have de-cluttered to an almost astonishing amount and seen so many positive changes from it (esp. in the kids room-- fewer toys has made a world of difference!) but I am still hanging onto things for sentimental reasons...not a lot, just a couple small desktop-size containers, but it is interesting to examine it further and realize that I'm really holding onto those things to take me back to that time in my life, which things can't do anyhow! It's the memories that they are tapping into.
ReplyDeleteI still have my stuffed dog from when I was a baby, and 30-odd years later, he's not going anywhere!
Thanks Bea, really well written as always.
Just wanted to tell you that I love your blog and always look forward to your post.
ReplyDeleteWell said! My purge is going quite well... three car loads so far, and I must say that once I got over the guilt, the trinkets were the easiest thing to get rid of. Why on earth was I hanging onto stuff that I didn't want given to me by people who I don't even like. All it ever did was collect dust and make me feel guilty. OUTTA HERE!
ReplyDeleteThis post was so timely for me! I just sold the vintage Fisher Price toys that I had loved as a kid, but that my kids never really played with much and are now too old to anyway. I really felt these pangs of....what? Guilt? Sadness? I don't know. But I realized that what they were from were the joyous memories I connected to those toys, and had nothing to do with my kids growing older, etc. Now I no longer have to feel sorry to see those toys all sitting in the laundry room unloved - they're off to a very excited little boy's house and that makes me happy.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I am sincerely challenged by your thoughts presented here. I know I have a tendency to excessive sentimentality and packratism and am working to pare down my "collections" to only what is really important to me.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the encouragement.
Sarah
I need a new word for purge. Decluttering? I have always been considered by most as a minimalist though I still have "stuff.". My family thinks I'm referring to an eating disorder when I tell them I have "purged" more things. They also think this is a disease. I have to find it amusing as I choose not to judge their lives, rather I choose to make a personal impact on how I tread the earth. I, too, am finding there is no need for extra family things that get boxed up and not looked at for years. Bea, thanks for your blog. It is great to know others care about their impact to mother earth.
ReplyDeleteBTW, I finally received credit for not only my grocery bags, but my hemp bags & mesh produce bags, at Whole Foods!
There is nothing non-functional in my home.
ReplyDeleteMy artwork takes my head to places, some not of this world, I could not go without expensive transportation and hotels.
There is no small multi-purpose keyboard I could afford which sounds like the baby grand piano I inherited from my grandmother.
My garden is not only exquisite it is good exercise, and needs space to put that which plants need to grow.
My needlework gives me something to do with my hands besides feed my face when I sit down for a quiet evening with my family.
My books let me know there will always be something around when I want to read even if it is in the middle of the night.
Most humans are like magpies and want shiny things for their nests. The kinds of shinys they acquire differentiates them from all the other magpies. The quickest way to drive me crazy would be to put me in a bare room and tell me I couldn't even think about decorating it.
I have the complete opposite opinion, taste and experience. In following your advice and the advice from an unclutterer blog, I have freed up enough space and rid myself of the things that got in the way of enjoying my knick knacks. Clearing away the detritus of daily life and reducing the space to store unnecessary items allows my knick knacks the space to really shine.
ReplyDeleteI have sort of a Japanese approach to knick knacks--I change many of them out with the change of the seasons, and there are some times where I "rest" my open spaces too. Knick knacks for me have an almost magical feng shui significance--the selection and placement are done very deliberately. Also many of my knick knacks are from my childhood home and help me to ground me to my past.
Certainly I think that the zero waste lifestyle allows for both views. I do not buy new knick knacks, and the decorations that I do acquire new every year are compostable--flowers, fall leaves and gourds, pine branches and holly, seashells (well, seashells aren't compostable but you know what I mean). My knick knacks are like my books--you have helped me clear out the ones that I had inadvertently accumulated, so only the ones I really treasure remain.
Thank you for all of your thoughts. I have been trying to declutter and organize my out of control home. I have found that once I wrangle like items together, I realize I own multiples of many items. Some of these no one ever needs 1, let alone 8! Feeling more free every time I find a new home for my unwanted clutter!
ReplyDeleteQuite simply: my husband!
ReplyDeleteHe is much more sentimental than I am; but, this is something we are working on. We are planning to move into a much smaller space in the next couple years so he knows he needs to pare down. My current project is the attic: 70 boxes of stuff, about 60 of which is his. My daughter is more like me, able to part with things and keep the memories in her head instead. My son is working on it and I think it will come in time. We never shop for pleasure, but Hubby has many boxes from his parents that he can't seem to go through. I do love your idea of one box per person. It's a goal for me.
Thank you for your wonderful blog!
It's kind of ironic that this post is about not having nonfunctional items in your home and the picture to go with the post is a vase of flowers... Just shows that beauty Does have a function. I would also argue that mementos serve the function of bringing back memories of happy times and people we love.
ReplyDelete-Cheryl
This is so causing me to rethink why I keep so many things. I should ask my kids if there are things they would like. If not, I should donate them.
ReplyDeleteThank you for a thought provoking post.
i admire your passion for minimalism, but there is stuff i keep around simply because i think it is beautiful. isn't that reason enough?
ReplyDeleteLovely post. Minimalism is indeed in the eye of the beholder. Each of us certainly can learn to think before we purchase as well as evaluate the items we do own.
ReplyDeleteAttachment to things is attachment to memories and sometimes those memories are the making of history. [old love letters found after your spouse has past on]
I've never been a knick knack sort of gal but my mum is. If it were up to me I'd get rid of it all - to her it brings her comfort - I'm also proud of her too because after 15 years of me trying to get her to clear out her garage - she did and she did a stunning job -
It might take some more time and my minimalist living may look different than yours but in all things Love and beauty in the space we occupy while on earth is what needs to be treasured.
I am blessed by your readers and your blog. Such wisdom and insight.
Just wanted to stop by and say I am truly enjoying your blog. I too am a francophile and live in California (albeit the south). This is a great post and I also love the photos of your home. Very motivating. I hope this movement becomes more popular. I still have to explain my style to many people.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteOnce again, I find myself mostly agreeing with you right up until the last phrase. "What keeps you from emptying your curio shelves?" really does imply that your way is the right way and, if we aren't living the sparse life, we are being encouraged to find out what's wrong wrong with us that's keeping us from it. The biggest problem I have is that when I walk into a space, I truly enjoy looking around and thinking about the person who inhabits it. Photos, artwork, color on the walls, and yes, even knick knacks, speak VOLUMES about who you are as a person. I enjoy making my home a reflection of our family. I'm just not sure I could personally live in a space that could just as easily be a beautiful hotel in Palm Springs.
ReplyDeleteThe things that are on my shelves are neither heirlooms nor collectibles from travels, but artistic pieces that add beauty to an otherwise dull and flat room.
ReplyDeleteWhile I appreciate decluttering, I too, do not feel that having empty shelves feels emotionally nurturing.
If you look in nature, there is ornamentation everywhere that serves a purpose for beauty and not just functionality. Beauty is functional. It's soothing. Whether it be flowers, peacocks, sunsets, flaming red japanes maples in the fall, pink blossoms on cherry trees in the spring, beauty draws us in and balances us.
Beautiful things need not be expensive, sentimental nor something we can't live without, but they do add to our lives whether it be a favorite crystal vase with fresh cut flowers in it or a pretty picture frame with a special photo in it with a scented pretty candle next to it.
We need not clutter our lives nor our children's lives in the process. We can paint beautiful murals on their bedroom walls that they can look at all day long.
Practicality and environmentally friendly living need not be stark or drab.
Thank you for your thoughtful words. I definitely struggle with my collection of books and try to give away books every year to lighten my load. Its all a journey and I hope one day I can be as clear and free as you are.
ReplyDeleteI have really thought an awful lot about Bea's post and the comments. I strive to live the simple life but after losing my mom, I can't bear to part with some of her things. On Mother's Day, I happened to come across a picture of the two of us and my newborn while I was "less is more-ing" (I call it) my picture box and I wept. I was so happy to find this treasure. A picture from 21 years ago with me and my first child and my mom. I am convinced that there has to be a balance between the mindfulness and clarity that comes from owning a few items and the joy and heart-aching emotions that owning select items brings to us. To be able to show my 9 year old a picture of my mom (her grandma who she never met) and her older brother was so special and the conversation around it was haunting and gut-wrenching. It was only possible to have this moment as we poured over that 21 year old picture. Take care everyone. :) S in San Ramon
ReplyDelete@ S. in San Ramon And you only found that picture because you were going though a box so you could de-clutter it? I think you found what you were looking for:)
ReplyDeleteThis is really powerful for me, and well timed. I have a real problem with clutter, always have, and now I own very little, and its still too much. My parents were collectors and they encouraged us to collect things. It is so frustrating because "collecting" is such a destructive force in my life, and I'm better than I used to be. Much better. I'm inspired to get rid of these things that are making me unhappy.
I think the point of the message is to ask what YOU feel is functional and beautiful, not to simply ape what Bea feels is so. In considering the question, you may find yourself able to divest yourself of lots of stuff that has outlived its usefulness. I see this as a conscious engagement with our homes--what do we really need, what items do we consider beautiful, etc. And of course, the entire family has the right and obligation to weigh in. It is the mindless accumulation of goods that seems to be the problem here. By continually engaging with this question, we may naturally find that we hesitate before bringing more stuff into our lives. Deb
ReplyDeleteso true: "I am free of the responsibilities related to possessing such objects." as I strive to become more of a minimalist regarding things, I am learning the greatest value lies in collecting experiences. my only collection I've kept through the years is of bowls, as they are useful. But I'm now letting go of the bowls that I never seem to fill with nuts/chips whatever. very liberating! thx, ZWH!
ReplyDeleteBea, Im interested in a vertical living wall. Im serching for on online. Can yo reccommend any? Thanks :)
ReplyDeleteDid you win the "Green Parent" award? Thats awesome if you did!
Selina
I grew up in the 40s-60s pre-consumerist, pre-car dominated culture. It was good. Much social engineering has created what we all battle/face today. For heirlooms and a look at the past, I like local museums to capture the stuff. I like Bea's real flowers and fruit bowl as consumable beauty brought in from outside. -Jean
ReplyDeleteI think this post is more a matter of taste. Bea, it seems like you are advocating a style choice rather than a more environmentally friendly way of living. I fail to see how throwing away or donating a "tiki statue" is going to help the environment. It will be trash now or later. If people are enjoying it now, it might as well be later.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you should start a new blog about minimalism because I don't see how this relates to zero waste. It fact it is encouraging throwing away of beloved items which creates waste.
I do agree that not buying these "curios" is environmentally friendly, but I don't see how getting rid of them will help anyone.
-Jackie
I have to say that first and foremost, I have to say that I believe in what you're doing. It's a call to action to change the way we live and I hope that the principles by which you live are incorporated on a grand scale. I think most of the objection to what you are doing is a matter of perspective from a cluttered life. There is a lot of focus from detractors on what is considered time-consuming, but twenty four hours is full of potential that we don't use. At first, I was skeptical and while I hesitated to call your lifestyle extreme (what you do in your home is your business), being a good person of science and logic, I read your entire blog and I came to many conclusions.
ReplyDeleteWhen someone says they don't have time to begin a zero waste lifestyle, nay-sayers have trouble realizing the truth. So no one has time for paper-making. What are they doing instead? For those of us still living a cluttered life, most weekends are spent stocking our cupboards with food we will never eat or reorganizing things we don't need. We all are told to only do wash when the machine is full. What exactly is filling the machine? Countless tee shirts collected from college days, gifts, souvenirs, presents? I can fill perhaps four loads or more with JUST TEE SHIRTS. That's insane! Why can't we make the logical solution to just get rid of all that clothing? It's also a false perception of cost. I work in Manhattan and I could spend $60 per week on lunch and snacks. By taking to time to make and freeze lunches at home, I can spend $20 for one month of lunches. In addition, I could buy cake mix, but I already have flour, sugar, eggs and milk. My cost for a two-layer cake is down to basically zero.
We spend so much of our lives reorganizing our ever-accumulating things that we don't get a free moment to do anything different. I became a believer in the zero waste journey when I decided to clear out my cupboards. I knew it would be hard to donate and I really wanted to feel what waste I was storing. That day I threw away about $100 worth of food that I had never used and that was all expired. I couldn't reuse it, donate it or anything. I threw all this food away and finally realized what terrible shopping habits I had. I didn't even know what food was in my house and I piled on more. I realized that I actually moved from apartment to apartment with expired food!
That revelation got me moving and over the last few weeks, I've donated about a third of my clothing. There were gifts I held on to for sentimental value and clothes I kept that fit me 40 pounds ago. We are very attached to things as human beings. They give us a sense of continuity and are the artifacts of our personal history. It can provide such an ineffable feeling of comfort. We have to decide, though, what is REALLY important to us. I know that shoes, clothes and jewelry don't represent my husband's love. He loved me just as deeply when we had nothing. Getting rid of all these useless things is a high and an addiction. I had a couple piles of clothes to fold and put away and believe me, I wanted to put it in a bag and head to Goodwill.
There are small things that we can do to change our perspective and realize that we have so much time and are misusing it. How can someone complain that there is no time in the day if they get up at noon? Illogical. Now that my cupboards are cleared out and my closet organized (almost), I have time to roast almonds for snacks, start personal projects, go hiking...
I apologize for such a long comment, but I had to express my gratitude for sharing your journey. It's an inspiration for us to slowly detach ourselves from a world of junk and finally be free.
I read this article about how the stuff that people are donating to disaster relief for the tornadoes, floods etc. has become a "disaster within a disaster". I felt real anxiety imagining this mountain of junk impeding the efforts to get help to people (not to mention the long term implications!). I wish EVERYONE knew about and was inspired by your blog! Refuse, refuse, refuse!
ReplyDeletehttp://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110515/ap_on_re_us/us_southern_tornadoes_donations
Interesting comment thread. Lots to read and all of it worthwhile. EXCEPT: the links to personal blogs. I can really do without those.
ReplyDeleteBea, please feel free to delete this comment as it's totally not germane to the original post, but I'm hoping you'll also delete the self-promotional comment. They really stick in my craw.
And ZWH readers tempted to post links to your blogs: please don't!
Firstly I just want to say how much I love your blog and find it very inspiring. I've been decluttering a lot lately and have gotten rid of many things I do not find to be useful or beautiful. I'm sick of 'stuff' that just sits there, cluttering up my life and my mind. But in saying that, I do think that it's nice sometimes to keep just a few things you find beautiful or special. The key though is to not become so attached to them, because as you say things do get lost, stolen, destroyed etc. We came into the world with nothing and we will leave the world with nothing. Memories and experiences are what's important :)
ReplyDeleteDear Bea -
ReplyDeleteI find your blog very inspiring. I don't think that I could live completely as you do, but I believe that is a personal choice. I happen to like lots of color and art.
You have inspired me to make changes, a little at a time. I have also shared your philosophy with over 100 high-school students who I teach.
I teach a segment on the effect of consumerism on the environment. Many of my student cannot grasp the idea of making a huge change, and I say to them "You don't have to change everything, just change SOMETHING. Make one better choice each day."
I remember reading one of your early posts about what a bad day you had at Whole Foods. I thought "Why would that upset her so much". However, a few days ago, my husband took my children to a birthday party at his sister's home. They came home with goody bags (not thrilled about this, but not bothered enough to make an issue) and 2 plastic grocery bags of things she had bought for almost nothing using coupons. Several small boxes of sugared cereal, small tubes of toothpaste in cardboard packages, and a bottle of Maalox (she doesn't use it, we don't use it, but hey, it's cheap because she's got a coupon, so she had to buy it? And then send it to me??). To say the least, I was bent.
And I realized at this point, I have made changes! Not just physical, but core changes. No plastic bags. Bulk everything. Still need to declutter, but as I am bringing less in, there is so much less to take back out.
So, thank you for making the choice to live Zero Waste. Thank you for taking the time to make changes. And thank you for sharing the journey online.
First, this is the most inspirational blog of 2010/2011 for me. I previously liked to live with Karen Kingston's "Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui" in mind (probably a publisher selected title - but it is fairly descriptive of her book's contents). She has wonderful messages on this exact same topic -- but several decades old, your zero waste angle has refreshed this in deeper ways with larger goals than individual benefit. Thanks, please keep this blog going.
ReplyDelete(I often wish you could be on Oprah to spread the message far and wide, especially for those who do not live on the coasts!! I went to visit my parents, and unlike in Seattle where even the most casual eco-minded person brings a reusable shopping bag - it was plastic bag mania. I felt so depressed and helpless.)
Wendy
Functional curio: I look at it, love it and feel a lift.
ReplyDeleteNon-functional curio: I look at it, hate, and feel dragged down.
Fortunately, my home has mostly the former and not the latter because the instant the former becomes the latter, into the Good Will box it goes, hopefully to become someone's former! :-)
Congrats! About the Green Awards... Johnson's Family you deserve it..
ReplyDeleteMy friend referred this blog to me. It is definetely great, and I am definetely will read your other posts. Looks like everyone knows about your blog, just not me, until now. Thank you for sharing with us.
ReplyDeleteDear Anonymous:
ReplyDeleteI have deleted my comment to which you found offense as well as your very rude comment on my blog.
My intent in my post was simply to provide an example of how I overcame "heirloom guilt" by repurposing something, which I believe is part of zero waste. Just sharing about something I wanted to trash for years but could not out of guilt. I am sorry if I offended you, but the spirit in which it was offered was quite honestly one of helpfulness.
Garage sale season is in full swing in my neighborhood and I am shocked by the amount of things, mostly knick knacks spilling out from the garage and on to the driveway at most people's homes. Especially baby/kid clothes and toys. This obviously is a great way of decluttering the home, but I just wonder how much stuff is really need to raise a child. These single family sales hold almost a full store inventory of clothing and toys and games. I wonder if young kids that have so much stuff also feel overwhelmed and cluttered? I'm not a parent yet but I hope reading this blog will get me in some good habits for the future, especially when children come along.
ReplyDeleteI have been invited to two weedings lately and after reading their registry list I was completely in shock. These young people get lost in the track of "make house" and start to buy every single gadget out there, like a mango peeler and cutter. Or a pressurized apple slicer and cutter. What happened to the old and good knife?
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I were into the "make house" track and then because of outside circumstances we had to downside and we found happiness in going back to a simple lifestyle, without all the extra "Martha Stuart" stuff.
I just wish that I could tell all these young couples out there: don't get into the rat race. Don't start filling your house with junk, just to find that you need a bigger house. And then go on to fill the bigger house with more junk and work endless hours to pay for all the extra junk and the bigger house.
Have you ever considered writing a book about zero waste? It could be an e-book, but I am sure a lot of people would enjoy learning more about it.
What keeps you from emptying your curio shelves?
ReplyDelete(Happy) memories, sentimental attachment or simply that I like the things. More important for me is: What keeps me from filling my curio shelves?! Insight. A change of mind and perspective. Things I have learned (partly on this blog).
Today I try not to get attached to things anymore like I used to and that is far more important to me than getting rid of things I AM attached to. I am fine with the fact, that I might or might not declutter certain things from my past. Thinking only brings me this far on certain things and I don't see the point in putting all my energy in trying to overcome every misconception I ever had. Especially if it lies in the past anyway and has little to do with how I eveluate things today. I have understood that you can very well decide about your future aquisitions and define your future attachment no matter how much of a packrat, clutterer or collector you've been in the past and no matter how attached you (still) are to your old things. Even if I have not stopped to like a souvenir from a (bigger) vacation, I now try to get me something I need anyway and try to limit myself to one item per important vacation (which practically is one item per year so I am not too scared of cluttering my space or running out of ideas for useful souvenirs). So far I got a potato peeler, a salt shaker, some t-shirts and flipflops and I love how on some days they are just everyday objects with no big thoughts attached and on some days they seem really special. A further plus: I think these kind of things would declutter themselves automatically once they break. Even if I am madly attached to some toys I had as a kid or a highschool year book or even my first pair of glasses I am no way going to hold on to a broken and worn out pair of flipflops or a peeler that doesn't do its' job.
I am a reformed knack collector! There is nothing in my home that doesn't hold special meaning to me...and it only enters my space if I consider it beautiful and worthy of my time.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I love to promote is when giving gifts to others, give experiences, not objects that must be set out on display.
Love your sentiments...even with the book collecting....Now I download books from my library and read them on my IPad....no more collecting!
Ciao bella!
CREATIVE CARMELINA
I agree, clutter of knick knacks can smother us. I don't buy things when on vacation for the very reason that I don't want to look at it every day when I get home. I've stopped buying souveniers for others too, instead I buy chocolate or other edibles so that they can enjoy the taste of the different places.
ReplyDeleteI have also come across my own struggles of parting with items. A possible solution, take a picture of it. Pictures take up less space (especially digital) and you can now free yourself from the item. Another solution I have is to say "Get Rid of it!" It helps me realize that this small object has no say in where I put it. So, I get rid of it.
There are so many good points on here! I look around and basically remember living in my apartment, where I told myself I'd only be for one year. In that time, I hung nothing, and displayed nothing. It was sad.
ReplyDeleteNow, when I come into my home, it's not cluttered with an abundance of "things" but there are enough mementos to help make me smile... And to me, that's what it's about. :)
When I first read this post, I thought, "But I love those few beautiful things I have on display in each room! I don't have many, but having something lovely to look at is essential to me!"
ReplyDeleteThen I realized that my version of 'knick knacks' are all functional. e.g. I have a small collection of crystal, and at any time there'll be 2-3 pieces on display on my sideboard and a couple more on bookcases etc... but it's all things like votive holders, fruit bowls and decanters. They all get used regularly, even if it's just to eat a meal by flickering candlelight. (Small pleasures.) I eat more fruit if it's beautifully displayed right in front of me, so it goes in a pretty bowl. I own two such bowls: one small and one large, and they get swapped out depending on how much fresh fruit we have in the house that week. Even a crystal trinket dish gets used to hold re-usable twist ties, to keep them out of trash and handy for when we need one.
Likewise, the 'display' in our bedroom consists of a gorgeous perfume bottle (which holds the fragrance I wear) and all my jewelry arranged in clear perspex containers. In the bathroom, there are more pretty glass containers, holding things like Q-tips, mouthwash, hand soap etc.
It made me realize that having beautiful practical items does away with the need for knick knacks entirely: using distinctive, individual pieces to keep our house organized means I have something interesting to look at in each room, without having to care for anything non-functional.
(Art is functional, right? ;)
I love color, art, and beauty.
ReplyDeleteI also love to look around and have things remind me of happy times. Sometimes on a sad day it is nice to have an extra push to cheerfulness.
I think its great to have memories inside your head, otherwise the souvenirs would be meaningless. I also think the lack of art and color is more of an aesthetic choice. People can still be zero waste and possess art, paint their walls crazy colors, have patterns with color on their drapes and furniture etc.
I want to live in a place that looks lived in, loved, and beautiful. For you that might mean white walls and the bare essentials. For me it means color, art, and reminders of my past.
Hi Bea,
ReplyDeleteI admire and follow your excellent example. This particular piece it’s kind of interesting for me. I have de-cluttered my house from objects and things I don’t need, but now my walls are empty. I realized I do need a piece of art in my walls. I have been looking but I have not found something meaningful for me. I never thought I would be at this stage in my life where I have to rethink about buying things, but it is very hard to just bring in new items in my house just because. I have to agree with some of the anonymous comments posted before that zero waste does not have to mean plain and boring.
I have a modern looking leaving room, but it is full of nothing, so much it makes it feel cold and empty. Zero waste means Refuse, Reuse, recycle in that order right? Well how about refusing garbage and reusing what we have to create art? I am thinking on making my own art for my empty walls. How about the little bit of trash that you have collected in four months, would not be neat if you created a piece of art with they trash you collected in say a full year. I think it would be super awesome and interesting to see what you would create out what would end up in landfills anyways.
Respectfully yours
Ximena
@Sara, crystal contains lead. It might not be safe to use them to store food.
ReplyDeleteBea, what do you do with Mother's Day gifts from your children? I guess they don't buy you anything but they probably make you something at school. That's the only items I have a hard time with. I used to move a lot so I am not a big fan of non functional items. I relocated to the US with just the two bags allowed by the airline.
I gave up books and souvenirs a long time ago. Especially souvenirs, which are now made in China anyway... I'd rather plan a new family trip/vacation/activity and live in the moment rather than the past.
Congrats for the award!
Natalie
Ximena,
ReplyDeleteWhat a great idea - to save your trash and create art! My husband just left for a trip to SF(!) to visit one of his clients who happens to be a waste management company. He said that they really try hard to not generate any waste at the office. For example, they ask him not to bring any handouts for his presentations which he happily complys with. In fact, they had comissioned artists from the area to create pieces of art out of waste they did end up generating and these pieces adorn their meeting rooms (I imagine to make a statement more than anything). Each room has a theme, like "cardboard." It is so inspiring to hear about these innovative people/corporations out there, doing these type of things.
Passing it on to the next generation :) This is a little off topic but i wanted to share with everyone how just making small efforts can make a big difference and the influence we can have in others just by them seeing what we are doing.
ReplyDeleteMy 14 year old son left me a note last night. It said. "Mom we need to talk about recycling." so when i woke him this morning he was telling me that the landfill in the neigboring town will take things to be recycled where as the one in our town wont.
We have de-cluttered and got our waste down to one kitchen bag of trash about every week and a half and only have the trash hauled every other week now and are working towards once a month.
He also said we should just take the trash there ourselves instead of having it hauled and that way we can save money and start to recycle our glass, cans and what little plastic we do have.
we live in a very small community in rural Alaska and dont have alot of options available for bulk items, but through persistance and thinking outsie the box we are making this work for us.
From the comments I can see that I have struck a sensitive nerve ;)
ReplyDeleteI only have a few comments this week (most of the comments refer to the posts that I had prepared for the following weeks, as mentioned in the article)
Chevanne: Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for your comment. You prove to understand this blog at its deepest level. You understand my message so clearly, I really appreciate your input.
Anonymous: For mother's day, my family surprised me with a homemade dinner, my youngest also dressed up as a waiter, My eldest wrote a menu. Scott cooked. Cute. Scott also gave me the tulips in the picture. The kids did not bring home anything from school this year.
Anonymous: "Zero waste means Refuse, Reuse, recycle"... you forgot REDUCE! and Reducing comes before Reusing;)
Beautiful and inspiring as always. We put our house on the market recently and went through the process of purging stuff and storing stuff.
ReplyDeleteNow the house is far less cluttered than it ever was and i find it hard to even remember what we stored and why I felt I needed to keep it. Our house felt so small before and now we are considering staying in our "little" house. Just with less stuff.
Thanks for another excellent submission.
ReplyDeleteDew
rural Arkansas with NO shelves
Joann, thanks for pointing that out! Before donating to a specific disaster, PLEASE ask the Red Cross, etc. what they need. They may actually have plenty of food or sweaters or whatever, and dropping off more can be a burden, not a help.
ReplyDeleteBea,
ReplyDeleteI am a follower of your blog and I definitely like to give away and unclutter things. I am working on convincing my fiance to cut down our book collection by selling our books to a local shop and donating the rest to the library. I have always been a more "experience" vs. stuff person. For instance while most of my friends were in the latest fashions or locked into car loans, I used my money to travel. I do agree that if the experience is rich enough, you don't need a trinket to remember it, so I don't usually buy lots of souveneirs. However, I will disagree with what seems to be, your minimalist approach. While your house is very clean and expensive looking, it looks quite sterile and just not very welcoming. I follow a little more middleground rule of thumb "Things brought into your home should be either useful or beautiful." I think that is a nice balance. It has helped me let go of just enough, but not too much. Pictures of my family and friends are beautiful to me and I like looking at them. However, the kitschy wall hanging I got from Target is neither beautiful nor useful, so it has to go. Things like my Grandmother's sweet letter she wrote to me, the last one before she died mean a lot and I am not throwing it away to pay homage to the minimalistic lifestyle. I do realize that I am limited because my partner is not gung ho about "Zero waste" as your husband and family are, so the best I can do right now is "Reduce waste" and for you, you are on a different level, "Zero waste" which means you have to eliminate even momentos and pictures. To each their own, but it's not a road I am willing to go down.
@ Sam: in response to your comment:
ReplyDelete"you are on a different level, "Zero waste" which means you have to eliminate even momentos and pictures. To each their own, but it's not a road I am willing to go down."
I think you miss the point. Bea shares what works for her and her family.
Find your own style in the world. I've never read that you must copy Bea's home decor style to strive towards zero waste.
It's such a petty thing to ridicule a person's personal decorating style while ignoring an important message about consumption and waste.
Sincerely,
Jessica
I don't empty my shelves or my walls because the things that I've saved mean something to me. I'm not a minimalist; I like to see art and finely crafted things. Some of them were passed to me by my mother and father, some I've found myself, some a loved one gave to me. They bring me fond memories, satisfaction at the craftsmanship that someone invested in them, and a sense of my own history. These attributes are more important than austerity or minimalism.
ReplyDeleteWe are in the midst of a renovation and I am finding more candlesticks than I can light, more books than I can possibly read, more frames and photos and paper. Your devotion to living simply inspires me to simplify and to live with far less...even in a larger space.
ReplyDeletepve
couldn't figure out how to comment on your latest post, so jumped to this post to say CONGRATS on your green award!! well deserved!! thanks for all the inspiration you dish out here and look forward to seeing just how you will take things to the next level with your award!
ReplyDeleteBea & others,
ReplyDelete"Grad Night DRINK DONATIONS NEEDED
We are hoping to have most of the 1,500+ drinks (soda and water) needed for Grad Night donated. Please start to watch the weekly advertisements for deals on BRAND NAME sodas (like buy 3 and get 5 free) and flats of bottled water. Please purchase what you can and deliver to either Kathy Moreno (4239 Pleasanton Avenue) or Joanie Tanonis (2531 Grappa Place)."
I was not sure where to post this one, but I had to share this. I just received this email from my kid's high school parent group helping with their Grad night celebration.
I am not only UPSET but feel so helpless at times like this.
Here I am trying to educate my children to eat healthy, live wastefree & care more for the environment; on the other hand they are bombarded to do just the opposite.
What are these parents thinking??
1500 plastics & cans.
Unbelieveable!!
Thanks for this great blog.
Sue
HI Bea,
ReplyDeleteCONGRATULATIONS, I knew you would receive such an awesome award!!!. Way to GO!!!
(I wanted to comment on it, but the Post a Comment section was not available). Keep the great work,
Ximena
Like others above I want to comment on your newest post but cant find the comment section:)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your green award and that is an amazing $5 dress. You really proved to me that it is possible to find what you need at goodwill. Whenever I have gone it has been frustrating to sort through all of the worn out, holey, stained, out of style, or ill fitting clothes. After seeing your dress I ventured into the thrift store and found that if you spend some time you will be able to find great stuff that you need.
to the above comment about grad night. I agree that it is terrible to see people drinking out of plastic bottles. I also think that it can be a great opportunity to lead by example. See if your kids want to go with a reusable water bottle. Every time I refuse something disposable, it makes people think about ways that they can reduce as well. It might take a while but people will catch on. Whenever I explain zero waste people are usually very gracious. It just takes patience, but soon everyone will stop their wasteful habits out of necessity:) Zero waste is the future!
ReplyDeleteIn the last year or so we've gone thru all our possessions and cleared away most items. I live by this motto: "If it doesn't bring me peace, I don't need it."
ReplyDeleteI have seriously minimized our hold on THINGS by doing this. I must say, I still have my books, and tend to buy only a new book on a very rare occasion and if I do, I know I'll keep it for life. I have joined Paperbackswap.com. A place to trade books for free :)
my family is slowly getting there. little steps right?
our first step. no paper towels.
My aunt directed me to your page :)
I had a question. How do you get your milk? Do you drink milk? also, and this may seem silly: toilet paper? the packaging from toilet paper really adds up!
great blog! I'll be back :)
Jill
Thanks so much for the acknowledgment! I feel strongly about decluttering my life and to be honest, the realization should have come long ago. About a year and a half ago, I was running out of space to put things in my 1550 square foot apartment. My husband suggested buying more furniture to store our clothes and I almost agreed. Wow. Thank heaven for this blog!
ReplyDeleteHello Bea, I am wondering if you use a cell phone, and if so, have you heard of "Credo"? They seem like a good green company, and I wondered if you knew about them, or what you think of them!
ReplyDeleteI started reading through all of the comments and got a little lost, so I'm sorry if I'm just repeating what someone else said.
ReplyDeleteHere's what I love about this blog post: Ask yourself why you are keeping certain items.
And then think about your answers. People have listed here some wonderful reasons to keep things (and I would argue that if you have de-cluttered, you can appreciate the few things you keep even more), but if your reasons are related to an image/idea you are protecting/harboring - either for your own idea of yourself or for others' idea of you - then let that idea marinate, and if you don't like it, make a change. If you're happy with your reasons for keeping these things, then fine. But think about it for a little while.
I, for one, plan to give that some serious thought.
i have a problem letting go of things that belonged to my mother who passed away when i was 13.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree that it's not necessary to keep everything - and I want to pass that onto my children. If I want to remember something that I once loved, I snap a picture of it and store it digitally. :-)
ReplyDelete@April: if you have a hard time letting go of those precious things, for goodness sake, please don't let them go. I have a rule of thumb when it comes to things that belonged to my grandparents: if it was something they owned but never used, I just give it away. If they used it or it was otherwise a part of their daily life, I keep it. It's part of my history.
ReplyDeleteI have been reading your blog regularly since seeing you in Sunset and have benefited greatly from your experience in journeying towards zero waste. This entry on letting go of non-functional items really touched a deep place for me. About 2 years ago I read a passage in a book by Pema Chodron that fascinated me. She wrote of an acquaintance who owned 600 objects. Period. "down to the teaspoons". For every object that came into his home, one left. His home was gracious, welcoming, comfortable. What would it be like to have a countable number of objects? How much stuff did I own?
ReplyDeleteI immediately instituted the one-in-one-out rule for myself. Then I begin to really look at all the stuff I had. About 18 months ago I started de-cluttering and to date I have gotten rid of over 1000 objects and I'm not done yet. My home is more serene, easier to clean and I use and enjoy what I have more completely.
Thanks for taking the time to share your experiences with us, because of Max's video I am learning Furoshiki. Fun!
Bea,
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to, first, comment that your blog has made quite an impression on me. I saw you on the Today show and the segment struck quite a chord with me. I guess I have always had "minimalist tendencies". I have also grown more and more frustrated with american consumerism and even more concerned with passing it on to my children. Not to mention its ugly step sisters: materialism, entitlement, waste, guilt, debt, environmental impact, and the list goes on and on... You have inspired me to begin my quest with baby steps. Little things like getting rid of all the clothes that I really don't ever wear, the redundant kitchen items, the extra toys, the books we don't even look at that I just dust every week... It has been so relieving and gratifying to me! What I wanted to point out in relation to this particular blog entry is first, that I don't feel like you are trying to force your EXACT model of living on anyone. I think the principles are there and I hope no one misses out on them just because they don't want to get rid of all the items of sentiment in their house. In my case, getting rid of all the extra stuff around my house has actually helped me to be able to focus MORE on the FEW items that have meaning, significance, or sentiment attached to them. In one case it was getting rid of all these notes and letters that I had kept that weren't particularly meaningful to me but finding among them letters from my husband while we were dating. Those I kept and put them in a special place! I think that decluttering the unnecessary stuff actually has helped me HIGHLIGHT the meaningful stuff. For my kids I see that they often get so overstimulated with all the toys in their rooms (most of which are not from me!) I did some weeding of the toys in my son's room and then I saw him enjoying many of his toys that he hadn't really noticed before amid all the mess. There seemed to be more contentment in having a few nice toys that he liked rather than a room full of overstimulating mess. I think that is a great metaphor for what this means to me. I don't feel like you are saying that everyone has to get rid of all things and paint all their walls white (though I must say, I don't think it's a bad idea ;). I feel like it is a message that can be applied in all different homes and personalities, both on an environmental and a personal/emotional level. Get rid of the stuff you don't like, don't need, don't really want. Clear away all the stuff that's taking the spotlight off of the things and people that really do matter and spend time and energy on the stuff that really matters to YOU.
Bea, this is a terrific blog. Thanks for your insight and enthusiasm. You are inspiring people to take a step towards real independence and personal freedom. We are slaves to Stuff (see the Story of Stuff) and our culture encourages the acquiring of it to line other's pockets. Wasting our money, energy and mind power, not to mention space.
ReplyDeleteI am most impressed with your reduction of garbage, though, more than the minimalism. A clean, clutter free environment is important for a calm mind, I believe, but creating the personal responsibility of transferring that philosophy to the trash can and the landfill or incinerator is even more noble.
The world is drowning in our cheap garbage!
The minimalism does encourage that end result, yes, but it bothers me thinking of all the garbage I've collected (toys!) over three children and am afraid no one wants and are just going to end up in a landfill.
I guess in this case better the landfill than my home. lol. Yet I cringe.
Physical clutter also clutters the mind, something many forget. I'm not talking about a book case filled with lovely books I re-read and go to for information, etc, but about coffee tables spilling over with magazines and remote controls, corners of rooms with stuff crammed in them; piles of unread mail; files that need to be sorted, coat racks filled with jackets, scarves, hats, bags; etc. We all know these nightmarish locations. They distract us psychologically from really important things, like our kids, learning a new skill, playing with our pets, having quiet time with oneself...
It's about balance and harmony. For some it means minimalism, for others it means sensitively placed objects of beauty and function (candles, photos, art), but for all of us it means peace of mind.
And when we buy and store garbage we don't have peace of mind. :)
Thanks again
Peace and blessings.
My husband's mother is an antique dealer. I've had to accept way more trinkets in our home than I'd like and believe me Christmas is a bonanza that I'd rather avoid all together. ARGH. But, it's my compromise. I'd really love getting rid of it all. I'm slowing working on him! Gifts of experience are coming this year.
ReplyDelete@ Jessica.
ReplyDeleteI did not intend to ridicule Bea's home decorating style, but I do realize my comment that her home looks sterile and unwelcoming may have come off that way. That was unintentional. I don't think I was missing the point. I get what she is saying, and I don't 100% agree with it. That doesn't mean I don't like this blog and haven't been inspired by it. On the contrary. This blog inspired me to start buying in bulk and reduce my non-recyclable plastic consumption very much. It has also help me see the wisdom in "gifts of experience" which I had already been doing, but wondering if that was a waste of money because I don't have much to show for my travels,etc. This blog has definitely helped me see that those are better than filling your home with junk. I hear what her message is and I was sharing my personal experience with finding a middleground. I am sorry if my thinking for myself and sharing a different approach offended you so much. Certainly wasn't my intention.
I have enjoyed reading your blog very much. I do not have a lot of clutter in our home, but it motivates me to look at what I have and see if I need it. I found the most useful thing I have learned is not to bring it in the house in the first place. Once it is in, you have to clean it, take care of it or get rid of it. It is much easier not to bring it in and not worry about all that. It is the same with recycling. We have a lot of things that we recycle, but if I don't buy it in the first place, we don't have to worry about recycling so much. Thanks for your inspiration.
ReplyDeleteReading this post and the comments with a very sweet little teapot between me and the keyboard. Dithering over whether to keep it or not I remembered about and rediscovered the Zero Waste Home and have spent at least half an hour catching up.
ReplyDeleteLove that you're now on Twitter and congratulations on the award and persuading them to take it back!
The teapot is off to the charity shop tomorrow along with other bits and bobs.
Thank you sharing your blog, Bea. Such an inspiration!
Bea, I'm so excited by the ideas of zw and have been slowly adjusting our lifestyle to be less wasteful. I love it all! I regularly visit your blog for renewed inspiration and ideas. I've been wanting to ask you where you got the clock that is in your kitchen. Would you mind sharing? Thanks for all your inspiration, you ARE making a difference!
ReplyDeleteDear B. It almost brings me to tears when I think of the beauty of EVOLUTION you have started on the planet. What you are doing will can and must spread to every corner of the Earth. I have been trying to slowly evolve as a result of your message. I replaced the use of paper towels with micro clothes as a tiny start and now make my selection of purchases with forethought of : Do I really need this ? I look around my house and ask.. Can this go? Sometimes.. I am stumped by... I will need this SOMEDAY! My camping equipment and tons of tools and decorations for my apt when it is finished ( I am in the middle of a renovation) yet once done I can remove a lot.
ReplyDeleteThe real purpose in my post is to say - Can you imagine the impact you have had already on the world and as a result of this magnificent concept and tools you have shown us. Because of THE INTERNET.. How far your teachings and eye opening thoughts you have generated are traveling! You are becoming a powerful force for change. Keep teaching it and pushing it to others.. I am in Sales. I don’t let people say NO to me.. UNLESS they understand what they are saying NO to.. Once they know what your message truly means, they will be glad you were persistent in giving out your message. I know the world will be.
If someone understand your message and its profound affects and implications.. They will not be able to say no.. yet if they do, you have at least done your best and a NO today.. can become a Yes to this lifestyle in the future…. KEEP IT UP… Al Friedar
Hi Bea,
ReplyDeleteWhat keeps me from emptying my shelves is the thought that I will need these "candles" for that romantic evening I plan or I'm going to need .... for when I have company.
How do you convince your clients to let these things go? What do you tell them?
My MIL is the poster women you describe in your post and I need advice in how to help her see that she doesn't need all the "stuff" she buries herself in.